After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul.And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't mean security. And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises.And you begin to accept your defeats with your head up and your eyes ahead, with the grace of an adult, not the grief of a child.And you learn to build...
20 Dec 2006
15 Dec 2006
Stop the World, I wanna get off
I was goona post this on Wednesday (today is Friday) with good news about my life and how I'm coping. I has a marvelous time at Outspan Hotel in Mt. Kenya, wont go into details. It's beautiful place, and I wanna go back, this time with better company.Anyway, I came back and left for Kitengela same day....
5 Dec 2006
I'm (going) Psycho!!!!
It's late..and here I am wondering what is wrong with me. Just of nowhere, after seeing my pal, some hours ago my body just shut down and I had to check myself to a hospital. When i got there, i went into a trance, just like that! I just sat there, immobile.Nothing made sense. Everyone seemed to be moving around, lifting this and that, just confusing me, making so much noise and I wanted to scream...
Passion versus Money
My twisted life took a 360degree turn today. Yesterday (before i went bonkers), i had gone for a interview kind of thing. I call it that coz we kept drifting from the topic and talking about stuff about the industry, people, quotes...you know it ended up being more of a chat than an interview. I think that is how all interviews should be conduced. I think we learnt a thing or four from the conversation...
4 Dec 2006
Rise of the Phoenix...fall of the same.. and bastard men
I told Isabel that I was rising from the water and i felt like the phoenix and she had the nerve to correct me and say that the phoenix rose from the fire. whatever the case, i rose and i felt like what i imagine the phoenix must have felt...reborn!I have had a feelings conflicting week that made me question the essence of life and why we bother living at all. don't be so quick to judge and relax,...
21 Nov 2006
My Space...My Downfall...My Recluse
It all started here.** One day I log on and I have this message waiting. Being the adventurous one, I replied. Now I wish I had not. I met him here, and here is the place I come to lament.
Even after writing that oh-so blissful life in Nairobi, I had to go back to Mombasa. and there, the ugly head of reality waited me. nothing had changed, nothing was gonna change. not in this life time. So I got...
15 Nov 2006
Back to Bedlam
This has been one of the most inspirational time of my life. After moving onSingleton town, and wailing all the way there, i finally discovered that i have so much to live for, so much more...So i've been working my pretty ass off, reading Isabel's blog once in a while, and reading so much i think my eyes will start rejecting anything written in colour. All in all, it's been a most fulfilling time.I...
28 Oct 2006
So this is how a heartbreak feels
I had the hopes that it was gonna work out. and yes i had all the signs that it was working. then comes the bombshell. he's not trying anymore. so once i again, no matter how many times i try to deny it, it happened. it's now over. and he did it over the phone now that I'm away for a month so that i can have time to heal. like my heart is a scrape on the knee that should heal in a few weeks. like...
21 Oct 2006
Back to (my) life
I'm sitting on some hotel rooftop, staring the sea ( that's not right, I'm staring at my screen as i write this) somewhere in an island where Donkeys rule. yep, you guessed it, I'm in Lamu. It is my first day of a one month movie thing that will see move between four towns in that period. and all i can say is though the pay is crap, i love being back in the game. location is my home, production is...
27 Sept 2006
So much for my happy ending...
What do you do when the one you thought loved you wakes up one day and decides that they don't love you in that way?What do you do when you thought you had found the one and they don't think the same way about you?What do you do when you look into the person's eyes and you see that they are just hanging on to avoid hurting you, even though the horse's already bolted?What do you do th...
27 Jul 2006
The Beauty of Change
I discovered one thing about me that i did not previously know, and if i did then, i was in extreme denial.I'm scared (shitless) of change. Of uncertainty and newness. I'm used to the fake security that comes with employment and the thought that i was gonna (try) run my own business was one i did not want to entertain.I was excited about my move until i discovered that I'll be out of my tough, and...
26 Jul 2006
Games gods play (on/with us)
Do you ever feel like the gods are somewhere, bored, with nothing more to create, and cant think of better ways to entertain themselves? That they are too proud to become mortals, well, who would envy such a life, especially if youre watching it from above, its like watching Jurassic park and wishing you lived there.To entertain themselves, they put you in the middle of the ring and takes turns at...
20 Jul 2006
Alien Dictionary
Alcohol a clear liquid that humans drink to make themselves feel better. It is disguised with different colors and tastes so that it doesn't become boring.Some of the methods of disguising alcohol are quite extraordinary. The effect of alcohol on humans is to make them fall down at parties.Those who don't fall down tend to become friendly and start singing. Those who don't fall down or become friendly...
2 Jul 2006
Men say women are complicated I say men are fucked up. They say we say are problematical. Yeah fucking right!!! They are just too lazy to think, and only do it when it suits them. How did I come to that generalization? Same way men do. One horrible experience with one woman and all women fall into that doomed category. Now change the genders and you have your answer. I thought I loved man. Was so...
