Sounds of Silence

I have been trying to hear myself think for the past one hour. I cannot. Yet I cannot even make out the conversations around me. Coffee shops make me want to write. Because,  somehow, I can immerse myself in my world of words and still be present to what is happening around me. And just then,...

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Blank Page

I’m a blank page That’s waiting to be written on I’m not pure, nor am I clean But am blank It’s not that I’ve always been so It is a state I have chosen I’m not new, nor am I unique But I’m blank I have been written on before Writings that hurt to the last ink drop I’m not white, nor am I rare But...

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The breath that still flows

A breath, yours  soft, hot, chilling  the ear, mine  curved - an art on skin  the meeting of both  explodes, a confetti of feelings  a beat becomes a throb  throbbing madness  of that breath that still flows  a begging of hearts  a pleading of souls  begging the emptiness of body  an urging of minds  that breath...

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Let my tears flow

Let my tears flow for a love that i've lost and maybe they might with them take away the feeling of loss to pave way for a brighter day Let my tears flow for it's as certain as the day dawns that i shan't ever find one like i had for the gift of love come from deep within and the rest maybe mere pretence Let my tears flow on and on and on, let them pass the sorrows reside...

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Empty

An empty shell blown away by the winds distanced from it's familiar shores desolate, hopeless and lost unsure of what the future holds... A dry leaf detached from the security of the tree threatened by the harshness of the world withered, cracky, almost rotten... A frozen drop condensed alone in eternal cold away from the rays so bright and warm hard, chilly, and frigid thawing...

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My heart's Sun - #2 Goodbye

I don't even know what i want to say. Which is ironic because there is so much to say. I haven't been able to write. Every time I push open my laptop, open a new page, I cry and shut it down. The last time I blogged was for you. The last post was about you. And that time, you called me immediately after. We talked. We laughed  This time, you wont be calling me. We won't talk. We...

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My Heart's Sun - #1

We do not have childhood memories. Us. Me and you. We did not run bare-feet across the corn fields, chasing butterflies. And even if we did, you would deny it, at least the butterflies part. Because you would hate to think that that admission might cost you the smile of that cute girl sitting across from us. You did not pull my hair and put bugs down my dress as a way of showing me that you liked...

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The mantises in my life.

I have been here before. Writing about rain. And always, my rain goes with tears. Not today. Today it rains outside, it pours like a punishment to earth. The soil cringe and dread the next rain drop. It prays that the next one will not hurt as bad, will be a tad bit gentle. Yet, it hurts more. And as it pours, helplessly the soil is taken away, to lands unknown. That has been my life for a while....

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But the bleeding, it does stop.

It's early. Too early. But isn't it always? I park my car and get out. It's the middle of nowhere. The sun has just risen over the hills, the thorny bushes just beginning to stir. I have always wondered if thorns go to sleep. Like, do the sharp edges soften with the cool air and the rising of the moon and the twinkling of the stars. Do the tips get caressed by the soft evening breeze, gently coaxed...

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Tears in the Forest

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Shred and Discard: Tales of A Coffee Shop

I woke up grumpy. Now this is not news to anyone who has to deal with me soon after my feet have touched the ground. My grouchiness is such that it annoys me. I will be angry that I am angry. Yeah, go figure. I have found out that two Redbulls will wrestle to the ground that feeling. Someone told me I ought to get my thyroid checked. And given that the other health issues that plague me do have something...

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Of tadpoles, sharks, fish, honeypots, gutter and androids

Head and tail. That's what makes them. The epitome of non-complexity. The exact opposite of what our lives are. What we have made them to be. Tadpoles. The beginning, is what they symbolize. Our beginnings. Simple, unmoved by the shark that is life. Head and tail. The beginning and the end. That simple. Yet it never is. The head calls for eyes. Eyes want to explore. See. Visions need to be processed. Interpreted....

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Dance of the Fly and the Twig

The Fly: She skirted around, her light feathers gently teased by the breeze.  It loved to tease her, that breeze. Blowing with just the right amount of strength. Not too strong, but not too feeble. Enough to caress her. She focused on the twig. Brown. Signified defiance. Of elements. Seasons...

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Why "Even Angels Fall"

This is not just a title I pulled out of my black behind. It's was not at the back of a Christmas catalogue or a Watchtower magazine. I'm a dark person. With darkness so dark the light is scared washing it away. The thoughts that run through my mind give me shivers, literally. I look at myself in the mirror, and sometimes I want to remove that person from me. But the realisation that that is truly...

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A walk with my thoughts

Thought #1 - The cold bites. It's too early to be awake. It's insane that the cold thinks its okay to bite this hard. The cafe is full. The warmth of the bodies mixed with the chatter envelopes our table. It's a gentle hum, one that could put you to sleep. It's me and a girl I just met. A girl whose earrings I noticed before I noticed the colour of her hair. She has this questioning look. A learning...

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More than 1000 words

A Meru Sunset Dance of the Fly and the Twig Watching Watch me walk away I am famous. Grouse! Lounge Room Bedroom I am dying Walk away ...

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It's been a while

...is the title of the song I am listening to right now. It's a song by Staind, and its got nothing to do with this post. I am typing this as I try so hard to ignore this dude on Facebook who i am regretting why i added him.  He is telling me how much he has been looking for me, how he loved me...

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The Special Two

I rarely post songs here. But this one is speaking to me right now. Lyrics below the video I've hardly been outside my room in days, 'cause I don't feel that I deserve the sunshine's rays. The darkness helped until the whiskey wore away, And it was then I realized the conscience never fades. When you're young you have this image of your life: That you'll be scrupulous and one day even make...

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With My Broomstick

I work better at night. Not with a broomstick. My brain. It comes alive. Inspiration seeps from the cracks in the walls and fill me up. The sounds of rats scurrying in my pantry, roaches biting at morsels on the kitchen floor... wait, that's for my other personality. One minute to 4 am and I am not alive with creativity. I am just awake. I have been reading. Something I am afraid I might forget how...

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Back from Bedlam

It's July. This month for me has always represented depression. Not in an 'need psychiatric' help kind of depression, but the 'nothing seems to make me happy' and 'I am too cold' kind. This started when I joined high school. Limuru is cold. I always suspected that if it wasn't so close to the equator, it probably would be snowing. It is where my crazy obsession with scarfs begun. Crazy I call it because...

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Dream of Paradise

Its 2.30 am. Once again I am awake. Once again, I hate it. I made new year resolutions about this. Sat myself down one evening and told myself how much we were going to start spending more time with sleep. We shook on it. Me and I. Insanity is…Except, this is not a choice. I am not doing this over and over again expecting different results. Wait. I am. I come to bed daily expecting to fall asleep....

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